Greetings all, I trust everyone is enjoying the rather splendid array of solar energy that has been delivered our way on this Good Friday. I must of course say thank you to Anna, Jo, Shilpa and Mary (Linked In) for deigning to read my last post and comments. Much love to all of you.
I will quickly touch upon the esoteric and mystical realm of our lovely little group this week. What marvellous work you all did and it's quite incredible what you can see when you just soften your gaze and look through what you perceive to be there. Fabulous.
Today, let us explore the role of trying to please everyone. I'm sure many of us in this existence find that there are times when you please Mrs X you upset Mr Z and Q. You then seek to placate their angst only to discover this act has now alientated Miss J and Mr O. In short such an act is beyond the realms of mere mortals as the human in each of us can be irked rather easily can it not?
I'm sure there are times in our lives when we've felt rather irritated by the actions of others and there will be moments when the acts we take do not inspire but instead cause much consternation. Dear readers, when these moments come along, try to refrain from the sometimes righteous path of indignation but instead catch those angry bees of thought and think to yourself: Why an Earth am I getting annoyed about this?
Now, this is not an easy practice I'm sure you will agree. There will be times when you may be justified and perhaps wish to box the protagonist around the ears with a rusty umbrella. An unusual weapon of choice but rather than indulge in a inflammatory path of brolly fencing try to place it back in the scabbard and choose the higher path. But dear writer, I hear you cry, that cad did accost me with some rather spurious actions towards my demeanour. I demand recompense, I demand he or she be punished.
I would say, now, now, even if this naughty knave did something injurious to your nature do try and walk away from those hostile intentions for you will merely incur much anger to yourself as well as your target of your animus. For sure, you may feel good to excoriate the individual but don't we often find that later on when things settle down we find ourselves feeling terrible. It's that nagging sentiment called guilt saying hello and it happens when we deviate from our higher calling.
You often hear the phrase speak your truth. There is wisdom in this saying but there ought to be a subtle addition in how you deliver the truth. Let us indulge those neurons in our imagination and visualise a scene where you are running a busy department and there is a member of your staff who is underperforming. You assail this individual with an invective or two and call him useless and a waste of time.
Now, you may well be quite correct in your deductions but what has this outburst achieved? A waterfall of pressure has now descended upon the alleged idler and whilst you are quite right to deliver your judgement, you may not have been aware that he has had a break up with his wife, he is heavily in debt and has just started a potentially dangerous descent into alcoholism. This is the downside of when we speak our truth in a overtly direct way.
Let us visualise an alternative. You have been aware that for whatever reason the employee hasn't been able to achieve his targets. You invite that person in for an informal chat and before even mentioning targets, ask how things are? He might clam up but you know something isn't right and after a while he can no longer refrain from owning up about the break up and may even allude to his financial calamity.
Of course, you could take the path of: Well, that's all very sad but you have targets to hit or the more conciliatory tone of guidance and assistance. You inform him not to worry and that you will have a look to see what you can do for him. Isn't that a far better approach than the previous course of action, although others may think differently of course.
Ergo, it is appropriate that at times we realise that the angry word seldom achieves our desired outcome. So do, catch those thoughts, pause and put them in the recycling bin and where possible, laugh, realise the silliness of many of the things that upset us and move forward. And in those moments, where you try to please everyone but can't, let us remember the wisdom of a certain Brian Clough which goes something like as follows:
"The player said he was right, I said I was right. We had a discussion and after a bit we decided I was right all along."
There are times when we must take this action. Remember, you are your own leader and sometimes we have to make a choice that will upset some no matter what you do. In these instances, always do what you feel is right for who is anyone to tell you it is wrong?
Goodness, the words have tumbled rather well tonight. On that note, I shall end and perhaps those paragraphs above have given us all much to cogitate upon. Until next I type, adieu and much love :)
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